Etymologically, “bulimia” comes from the Greek bous (meaning “ox”) and limos (meaning “hunger”).  One with bulimia is said to have the appetite of an ox. 

Wait… appetite of an ox?  Ohhhh, I get it.  People with bulimia have the desire to eat grass.

I’ve been reading a lot about sexual ethics, so forgive me if my past two posts have been in the same vein.  In early theories of how babies are made, semen was believed to carry a homunculus (Latin for “little human”).  This theory of preformationism was prevalent before we understood that both a man and woman are equally important in active procreation.  So, yeah, some philosophers and scientists actually believed semen contained a miniature, fully-formed human.  Once the homunculus was inside the woman, development was solely concerned with enlarging this miniature person.  How stupid is that!  Sounds so ridiculous.

But…if we would go back in time and tell them that semen really contained millions of tiny tadpole thingies… I think that would freak them out more.

“Tiny tadpole thingies” is the terminology they use in advanced college biology courses.  Trust me.

I was perusing an etymological dictionary, and, like an 8-year old, I immediately looked up the word “penis.”  I haven’t changed at all.  I remember when I was younger I would look up the word “sex” in every dictionary I  could get my hands on (if I had a time machine I would go back in time and stuff child-me in a locker).  Anyway, “sex” was always next to some picture of a “sewing machine.”  That led to years of confusion.

As for the fact…well, the etymological dictionary told me that the proper plural for penis is “penes.”

I would hate to be the guy that had a reason to make the plural of that word.  Or would I love to be that guy… 

That’s all I got to say about that.

A Catch-22 refers to an unsolvable logical dilemma.  The phrase comes from Joseph Heller’s 1961 novel “Catch-22.”  The number 22 has no significance.  Heller originally intended to call it “Catch-18,” but this was rejected by his publisher for being too similar to the title of another recently published war novel.  “Catch-11” was also proposed and rejected, due to its similarity to the film “Ocean’s Eleven” which was released in 1960.  “Catch-17” was then also rejected for similar reasons.  “Catch-14” was rejected because the publisher didn’t think 14 was a “funny number.”  If I were Joseph Heller, I would have just given up.  Clearly, there was no way he would win this battle with his publisher.

The mullet is undoubtedly one of the most painfully enchanting haircuts of all time.  There are hundreds of epithets for the mullet: “Business in the front, party in the back,” “The Tennessee Top Hat,” “The Kentucky Waterfall,” and my favorite “The Missouri Compromise,” to name just a few.  But the Oxford English Dictionary credits the term “mullet” to the Beastie Boys, and their 1994 song “Mullet Head.”  Just recently, in attempt to thwart westernization, the Iranian government issued a catalog of acceptable male haircuts.  The mullet has officially been banned.  Hmm… Iran actually got that one right.  Maybe we should try to thwart westernization too… 

NOT! 

The mullet is proof of the duality of the human soul. 

The word “stroke”, in the medical sense (as in apoplectic seizure), is a shortening of what was originally “The Stroke of God’s Hand.”  You would think the Stroke of God’s Hand would be a little less miserable than that.

In 1942, duct tape was invented to seal ammunition cases during World War II.  Many etymologists believe that it was originally “duck” tape, stemming from its similar appearance to cotton duck, which is known as canvas for people outside the textile business.  I am not in the textile business, which is known as the “rag trade” in the UK and Australia.  I don’t remember what my original fact was.

The monster Godzilla first appeared in a 1954 Japanese film called “Gojira.”  The name Godzilla is the anglicized form of Gojira, which is a combination of two Japanese words: gorira (gorilla) and kujira (whale).  This is fitting because, in the early stages of the film’s production, Godzilla was described as “a cross between a gorilla and a whale.”

A cross between a gorilla and a whale?  What an odd and useless creature. I can imagine the script:

Man 1: Watch out for Godzilla!

Man 2: Why?

Man 1: Because it’s a mix between a gorilla and a whale!

Man 2: So…It’s a super endangered species?

Man 1: No, it’s a mix between two giant things.

Man 2: Yeah.  But it’s probably extremely awkward and worthless on land and water…Sounds kinda hilarious actually.  Let’s go poke it with a stick.

Stetson helped popularize the “ten gallon” hat, but that doesn’t help me understand why these cowboy hats are considered ten gallon.  There are two common explanations.  The first, which is likely false, is that it refers to the hat’s ability to hold water (however, a real “ten gallon” hat only holds about three quarts).  The most widely accepted theory is that it is a language mix-up.  Cowboy hats came to Texas by way of Mexico.  In Spanish, galón means “braid.”  Some vaqueros wore as many as ten braids on their hats.  Do you realize how stupid everyone would look if the cowboy hats held 10 gallons of water?  Well, not everybody…most people don’t wear cowboy hats.  But if we did it, it would be like walking around with water-cooler jugs on our heads.  

“Scot” is a Scandinavian word for tax or payment.  “Scot free” just referred to someone not paying taxes.  So, if you don’t pay taxes you’ll be getting away scot free, in the literal sense.  It’s unlikely that you’ll get away from the government scot free.

Excappare is the Latin root of the word “escape,” which literally means “out of one’s cape.”  The ancient Romans would escape capture by dropping their capes when fleeing.  I don’t really know how much time that would buy you.  Couldn’t the person chasing you just drop his cape too?  Or perhaps, you could just start off not wearing a cape in the first place.   How lame would Superman be if his only defense was throwing his cape on the ground and fleeing?  Thankfully, Clark Kent isn’t an ancient Roman.  Or a real person…

The most hilarious planet, Uranus, is named after the Greek god of the sky, Ouranos.  On this astronomy website, several astronomers discussed the pronunciation of the planet.  Dr. Pamela Gay notes, “The safest way, the way that’s least likely to get us made fun of by any small children is to say Uranus (UR-uh-nis), but there’s also the famous ur-ANUS way of saying it.”  I wonder how Dr. Gay pronounces her last name to avoid getting made fun of by the said small children.

In Middle English, the word pygg referred to a type of clay used in pottery.  People often kept their money in jars made out of this clay.  They were called “pygg jars.”  Eventually this evolved into “pig bank,” and finally “piggy bank.”  I remember seeing in cartoons people breaking their piggy banks open with a hammer to get the money.  I always questioned the thinking behind that decision—-you’re going to spend all your money buying a new piggy bank.  A vicious, irrational cycle.

Herpetology is the study of reptiles, coming from the Greek herpeton, literally meaning “creeping thing.”  This is also where herpes comes from.  I mean the word.  The actual viral disease comes in a much more informal way. 

In Old English, the word “man” simply refereed to the human race regardless of gender.  The word wer meant adult male, as seen today in “werewolf.”  Wif was the word for an adult female.  The word “woman” derives from wifman, which just meant “female human.”  Also I’d like to mention that the word “female” is unrelated to the word “male,” which comes from the Latin masculus.  The word “female” comes from the Latin femella.  In the 14 century, the English spelling was altered so it paralleled the spelling of “male.” 

I am so sorry for all of the quotation marks and italics.  I have confused myself to the point where I didn’t learn anything.  I only got dumber today.